Why don't you ever stand up for me ;(

A really serious question? Would any of you let a family member talk down or back to the person your in a relationship with. Would you just stand there and act like nothing is wrong? Never come to the defense of your other half. Or would you tell the family member to take a hike? Never to speak to your other half in such a way.

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Permalink Reply by Death is Drunk on September 14, 2008 at 12:28am

I haven't experienced this personally I wouldn't let a family member to do that. It's very disrespectful.

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Permalink Reply by MER on September 14, 2008 at 12:29pm

I'm sure it'll happen to the next boyfriend I let my father meet. I'll stick up for them then b/c my dad's an ass and sometimes he needs to be reminded of manners.

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Permalink Reply by Rosenda on October 2, 2008 at 8:19pm

I'd stand up for them. Ain't no reason not to.

I do understand within a family, sometimes your natural instinct is to keep the peace. I am like that when it comes to my boyfriend, if it's just me and my dad talking. My dad does not care for him (my mother said she thinks he reminds him or himself when he was younger), and while he is very polite and friendly to my boyfriend in person, when it's just me and my father, he occasionally reminds me that he does not really like his personality or whatever, even though my mother likes him and thinks he's great.

I can take the in private stuff, it doesn't bother me, because my relationship and personal life and time is with my boyfriend, and it's not an issue. I don't get into an argument over it with my father, because it's not necessary and I'd rather just let my dad say how he feels to me and let it roll like that.

However, for someone to go off on your loved one IN THEIR FACE, in front of them, that's not cool. If it bothers you, but you are concerned about starting World War II at home over this, just calmly and firmly and loud enough: "That was really disrespectful of my man/woman. Keep your opinions to yourself." Tell that family member to stop talking negative about your man. If that family member tries to say it's only cause they are concerned, be sure to tell them the good qualities that your man has. Say something like "He's good to me, he's kind, funny, smart, etc. I like him and that's all that matters."

Just be straight with them.