... the other Black experience
What's the worst thing you've ever done in/to a relationship?
What's the worst thing you've done to a person you were in a relationship with? Have you done something horrid to romantic partner of a friend?
I've done plenty. ^__^
I've done plenty. ^__^
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by X-D-D-M*9 on
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Nadira_Akila said:hahahahhahahhah damn brotha Dao! hahahahahhaha
Daoud said:I've done my best to be above the board with most of women I've dealt with. There are only a few situations where I've had to get a bit raw:
= This one woman kept playing games, so I blocked her number from my house phone. She made it her business to regularly call me up from another phone and curse me out. I used to play her messages for my bros and we'd laugh our asses off.
= I was at a club and this cute sister who was with this white dude kept looking my way. After about a third look, I stopped her and kicked some game. The white boy was mad salty but he just stood to the side while his girl was smiling and flirting back. This has happened on more than one occasion...
= I found out I was involved with a woman who wasn't fully divorced from her husband. This totally was not my plan but I continued seeing her shortly afterwards. This happend one other time but I cut it afterwards.
= After going through a crazy 'close call' with a woman and leaving her be, I fell in temptation to her 'skills' on her job. She extended more offers but I finally closed that chapter.
How about the other side; the worst you've been played?:
--- I was talking to this one sister for a few months that lived in my building. I was good friends with her friend who also lived in the building and their crew. I went out of my way to bring this woman gifts, flowers, poems, the whole nine. I cut off many other women for her. For real, I was infatuated on another level, felt like straight cupid through my heart.
One day I pass by to see her and hear she's in the hospital. She had been having complications with her pregnancy (what?) from the man she's been in a long-term relationship with, during the time when we were supposed to be talking. All her friends knew the deal but let me just play myself the entire time. Oh well, so much for that. Now who I'm going to give these roses too?...
I ran into her last time I was in Atlanta. She's still very attractive and I sensed some interest, but my more logical mind said to stay clear for both of our consciousnesses.
I'll stop there for now.
But I've changed, really though ;P...
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Permalink Reply by Golem_3 on -
telling her I loved her, when I really didn't.
Thats pretty much the show-stoppin deadliest of all sins.
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Permalink Reply by Rhinos Have More Fun on -
After knowing a particular woman ("Masha") for about two weeks, I brought her home once and we had a really nice romantic time. She brought a bottle of wine, we talked, had fun... I don't know what it was, but I didn't enjoy the sex much at all--and I have a pretty good idea that she felt the same way.
BUT I had no plans to stop seeing Masha. I just think we hadn't figured each other out in that way.
A week later, Masha called me to tell me that her mother had passed and she wanted me to stay the night because she needed company. No sex--just company. I was totally cool with that. I know I would have wanted the same thing.
There was one thing, though. I think that night I was starting to notice that she looked a bit like someone from my past that I couldn't "be with" again in that way. So I believe I probably put up some sort of block.
Meanwhile, I had also been seeing this other woman ("Cleotonia") on/off, whose everything I loved and whom I had thought was absolutely AMAZING in bed. The night that Cleotonia was over, Masha called and wanted to talk. I didn't want her to let on that I had someone else over, but I didn't want to be rude either. So somehow, Masha figured out what was up. Cleo didn't care that I was seeing another woman; maybe Masha did, but this just didn't seem like an appropriate time to tell her.
In short, Masha broke it off with me. She sent me a very short email that told me I shouldn't do that. And although we hadn't established exclusivity yet, I felt really bad about it. I even tried to call her back to see how she was doing.
My guilt stems from the fact that (1) I possibly led her on--her resemblance to an ex made intimacy really uncomfortable for me, (2) I hurt a woman who had just lost her mother. THAT has to be pretty bad.
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Permalink Reply by Nadia C on -
Never during. I"m not that sort of person. Even if you're not a "looker", I would never tell you that to your face, just for the fact that you love me. Or "Love" me, as it's turned out to be the case with a lot of the people i've gotten involved with. When the relationship was over, though, hehe, the games began. I will tell you how whack you were in the sack, how ugly you are, and how you will never amount to anything just for the sheer fact that you're a liar, and everyone around you will always know that, or find it out sooner or later. Hey, the thing is, all of the people i've dated and dumped, have not been nice people. Or genuine. Or truthful. And since they were so on their high horse, I don't mind bringing them down with the truth. I'm not a vindictive person. Ok...Let me think...During during. Have I done anything mean during the relationship. Ok. I actually can. But this is because, although I noticed how much a jerk my partner was at the time, lying to me and to others, yet I was still trying to be with him out of an irrational idea that I could make him a better person. But he really got to me sometimes and I wanted to get him back. He was a "Satanist". A midget from El Salvador. Thought he was a God. Practiced Voodoo. Had a bunch of La Vey books. Had Ra on one arm. Anubus on the other. A Proctor's and Gamble Ouija board.(Why am I admitting this? This just making me look soooo bad right now, lol). Really. All of the people around him warned me about him, and didn't want anything to do with him out of a fear that he'd chop them up in the middle of the night. And he thought they were his friends, when in reality, he was just their third wheel. They actually ended up throwing him out of their pad, which he was leeching.moochin off of, shortly after I left. Which is my little claim to fame as far as that goes. Anyways....1
Anyways, I told him I needed to grab a Playboy I had laid out while we were in the "mix"...Cause I needed some stimulation and wasn't getting any from him.
Yeah. I"m not gonna lie. I meant that one to hurt.
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Permalink Reply by Sean Padilla on -
When I was in high school, I completely cut off communication with a girl I was dating, and gave no reason or explanation for doing so. I was having a hard time grieving the loss of a relative, and I didn't feel like talking to anyone. There was absolutely nothing wrong with my then-girlfriend, but my silence convinced her otherwise. I'm pushing 30 and I still regret it, though I'm sure she barely remembers me @ this point.
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Permalink Reply by Madamoiselle De Sade on -
I lol'd at "cottage cheese arms". Some people have those!
I am vindictive. They should never have crossed me in the first place.
I tend to lay out how fucked up I am when I first start talking to a person and tell them how little I value "talking" in terms of monogamy. Like "just talking" is nothing and I can see other people and keep my options open.
Recently, I sent out an email telling a dude who liked me about how I was no good. He still likes me. What's wrong with him?
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Permalink Reply by hidaya on -
you dont think karma will hit u hard?
Mlle d. Sade said:Smidgetbynature said:Hmm, I technically wasn't in a relationship, Just hooking up with a friend who had a girlfriend...Yeah It didn't end well for me. I became horribly attached to him, while he had to face the guilt with his girlfriend. Right now they're ok cause he didn't tell her, but if they decide to tie the knot, he's gonna a whole lot to tell her.
I basically ruined their future together :P
And the guilt is still there...along with my feelings for him.
Blah! x_x
I don't think you've ruined their future, at all.
I've:
flirted and gotten phone numbers in the presence of my current partner while he was forced to stand aside and watch (it was at his which I also worked at). It's called the Medusa affect.
Broken up with someone on their birthday.
Screwed and left my underwear in a place I knew their s.o. would find.
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Permalink Reply by hidaya on
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But the worst thing I've ever done was mash up his car after he played me for a white girl. I wasnt in a relationship with the dude but I was hollering at him and his co worker at the same time. I was young and dumb and really hurt from a previous relationship so I was out to hurt everybody else. The reason I spoke about Karma is because it came back to me. I hope its done because Im in a relationship currently and really love the person and hope that this isnt effected because of past actions. ya dig?
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Permalink Reply by kifaru on -
Oh, You done f***** up now, Hidaya. You should have never included the part about the white girl. Now is part where you are going to be getting folks psychoanalyzing you and trying to assert that what they percieve as your racism against latinos is rooted in your rejection by a brother whowas chasing a white woman. At least that's my prediction. Look out for the low blow when the mob smells blood.
hidaya said:But the worst thing I've ever done was mash up his car after he played me for a white girl. I wasnt in a relationship with the dude but I was hollering at him and his co worker at the same time. I was young and dumb and really hurt from a previous relationship so I was out to hurt everybody else. The reason I spoke about Karma is because it came back to me. I hope its done because Im in a relationship currently and really love the person and hope that this isnt effected because of past actions. ya dig?
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Permalink Reply by hidaya on
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For all those looking to throw the low blow, I never liked them. I grew up in a militant household and I took the history lessons really personal if you know what I mean. I used to rock with Latinos until I found out they really thought they were better than blacks, but their females would shove any black dick moving down their throat! Secondly my personal experiences with them BEFORE I even met the ex was negative so he didnt cause it.In fact he thought it would have really hurt me as told to me by his sister that i saw a couple of years later. Thirdly, Im glad he did what he did now, because I found my husband who is a good man. So all those who will try to explain my feelings as anger or envy you get a buzzer. Nothing like that over here. kifaru said:Oh, You done f***** up now, Hidaya. You should have never included the part about the white girl. Now is part where you are going to be getting folks psychoanalyzing you and trying to assert that what they percieve as your racism against latinos is rooted in your rejection by a brother whowas chasing a white woman. At least that's my prediction. Look out for the low blow when the mob smells blood.
hidaya said:But the worst thing I've ever done was mash up his car after he played me for a white girl. I wasnt in a relationship with the dude but I was hollering at him and his co worker at the same time. I was young and dumb and really hurt from a previous relationship so I was out to hurt everybody else. The reason I spoke about Karma is because it came back to me. I hope its done because Im in a relationship currently and really love the person and hope that this isnt effected because of past actions. ya dig?
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Permalink Reply by hidaya on
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I need to clarify this statement. I was stating two things i did wrong. The first was mash up the car (1 experience), the second was date the two guys(about 3 years after the other incident)
hidaya said:But the worst thing I've ever done was mash up his car after he played me for a white girl. I wasnt in a relationship with the dude but I was hollering at him and his co worker at the same time. I was young and dumb and really hurt from a previous relationship so I was out to hurt everybody else. The reason I spoke about Karma is because it came back to me. I hope its done because Im in a relationship currently and really love the person and hope that this isnt effected because of past actions. ya dig?
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Permalink Reply by Madamoiselle De Sade on
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Didn't read the rest of the discussion did you?
Ivfelyn was hitting me with some old and bitter shit ("The world is not going to change for you so start submitting and surrender any sense of individuality and pride you have, now" is basically what she was saying. Also, latch onto any man, I think. I sorta believe in women's rights and social justice so I pick who I choose to date carefully and if they do something closet sexist they will get a receipt- here's what I think of you in return). Life is about conquering not being conquered. In the words of the Venus in Furs "It is woman's burden to be desired, what can I be if I cannot be cruel?"
And I'm starting to think karma is a clap trap. More cult talk.
hidaya said:you dont think karma will hit u hard?
Mlle d. Sade said:Smidgetbynature said:Hmm, I technically wasn't in a relationship, Just hooking up with a friend who had a girlfriend...Yeah It didn't end well for me. I became horribly attached to him, while he had to face the guilt with his girlfriend. Right now they're ok cause he didn't tell her, but if they decide to tie the knot, he's gonna a whole lot to tell her.
I basically ruined their future together :P
And the guilt is still there...along with my feelings for him.
Blah! x_x
I don't think you've ruined their future, at all.
I've:
flirted and gotten phone numbers in the presence of my current partner while he was forced to stand aside and watch (it was at his which I also worked at). It's called the Medusa affect.
Broken up with someone on their birthday.
Screwed and left my underwear in a place I knew their s.o. would find.
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