When I'm starting to get mad I laugh?

So something I've noticed about me is with my girlfriend if she says something to make me mad/pissed or anything around that then I laugh. It's seems too stop me from saying something that would cause us to argue even more. But when I do laugh she takes it as me laughing at her. She knows I laugh when things like that happen and still takes it like that. I don't get mad really..Seems to take alot for me to. I figure it's because how I laugh it off.

So to everyone on AP I'm wondering what do you think?
Laughing things off is it bad? I'm not yelling back hurtful things or things I'll regret so it's not too bad?

*** I don't just laugh on purpose. It's not funny the least bit but I seem to still laugh.***

Tags: Control, anger, helps, laughing

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Permalink Reply by Renegade Muthafuckin' Green on August 10, 2010 at 4:32pm

i have the same issue....i was told it makes me look crazy...

but i dont think its an issue...its better than either going crazy, or doing something hurtful.

so i think, keep laughin.

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Permalink Reply by Golem_3 on August 10, 2010 at 6:34pm

Maybe she thinks you're not dealing with her anger the way she wants you to.
Do you know why she says things that she knows will get you mad?
True, her actions aren't productive for having civilized dialogue, but she probably expects you to figure out how to address her concerns.

A better question-
why do you feel that if you say something, it would cause an argument?

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Permalink Reply by NikkTemplar on August 10, 2010 at 7:02pm

I don't do it when I get mad. I do it when other people start crying. I have to bite my tongue HARD to keep from busting out into a full blown guffaw.

...especially when my mom cries. Every time that happens, I have to excuse myself and laugh my ass off.

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Permalink Reply by Travarus Littlejohn on August 10, 2010 at 9:32pm

Golem- She says them when we argue/disagree with each other. You know like when ppl say things out of anger? Sorry I ddint make this too clear.
- No i don't think everything I say will continue us arguing or start one. when i want to say something i start laughing because well heck I don't know ha. Seems as if i cant control it.

*computer wouldnt let me reply =p sorry

Nikktemplar - Not on purpose right?

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Permalink Reply by Rage_Proletaire on August 11, 2010 at 8:22am

To some people, laughing may be considered a dismissive gesture. Taking some liberties with what Golem said, (it may be) a way of implying that you're unwilling to deal with someone's anger, or even acknowledge it and hear 'em out. Stonewalling, so to speak.

I've prefaced a lot of confrontations with a laugh before, and it always backfired. Sometimes laughing seems pompous; sometimes it reveals the exact opposite of what you're trying to convey superficially.

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Permalink Reply by NikkTemplar on August 11, 2010 at 11:14pm

99% of the time, it's on purpose. The remaining one percent is on accident and it's usually involving someone that I don't want to pour gasoline on.

Travarus Littlejohn said:

Nikktemplar - Not on purpose right?

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Permalink Reply by Rosenda on August 19, 2010 at 1:28pm

Dudes, whatever you do, fight that urge to laugh at a woman crying. Especially if it means something to you.
My former boyfriend of 8 years, right before he broke it off with me, did that. IT FUCKING HURT SOOOOO BAD.

It has scarred me forever, believe me. The memory of that experience of him laughing while I was crying HARD in pain is AWFUL. Fucked up ridicule is what it feels like.

It is a nervous or scared reaction, I think. He even said so at the time. But that will NEVER EVER excuse it or make it feel better. Good luck with that. I suggest if it happens to any of you guys again: do yourself and the girl a favor: IMMEDIATELY WALK OUT OF THE ROOM IF YOU FEEL LIKE LAUGHING.

You will save yourself a lot of trouble, especially if you REALLY and TRULY care about that girl, or at least if you don't want to hurt them. Fucking hateful awful shit that is. It's a painful guttural primitive messed up fucked up HORRIBLE thing to be on the receiving end of that, no matter how strong you are or THINK you are in handling it.

I gotta stop thinking of that happening in the past. Bad bad memory, folks. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy or on the men or the women who have hurt my feelings, no matter how fucked up they are or what assholes they are. Really. Even if someone deserves bad treatment, I would not wish that on anybody. Ever.

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Permalink Reply by Rage_Proletaire on August 22, 2010 at 11:36am

Rosenda said:

... It's a painful guttural primitive messed up fucked up HORRIBLE thing to be on the receiving end of that, no matter how strong you are or THINK you are in handling it...

::nod::
I agree.

It's one of the few things I've done in the heat of argument that made me feel small, in the end.

When my anger got laughed off as a child, it was the equivalent of a little red button being pushed. Still kinda rings true, now, despite my "Sternness" steez.

Strangers, though (and worst enemies), are an entirely different matter for me. I've done it many times when verbally threatened by strangers w/ self-esteem issues who take offense to my presence (by that, I mean fellow black males around the same age who insist on feeling like the alpha-male at the local Wal-Mart). I usually expect to get rabbit-punched upon walking away, but that's yet to happen.