Where Are They Now? An AP Report!

Basically, I wanna know all your personal business. Talking with folks on the old boards really helped me sort out some personal questions. If you have a story about AP fam getting you to where you are now, please share!

Some of you might remember I was having relationship woes. I'm happy to say I'm engaged (to a former APer) and excited as hell, now. Alright, alright. So I don't owe my engagement to AP alone, but I tip my hat off for the expert advice.

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Permalink Reply by Rosenda on March 17, 2009 at 11:08pm

J9, I have found that the same way in real day to day life with people I meet in person.
Some folks turn out to be your always trust life long friends and or loves and some are fly by night "why the hell was I so interested?" I'm sure the same goes for people who have met me. Some people click and some people don't, but I think it's harder, to deal with the contrast of first vibing well with people online.

When it happens and the few times I've met the person in real life, I always force myself to reality in my mind that physical face to face meetups are 50/50 that they'll work out or not work out, REGARDLESS of how close you feel you were online.

The thing is when we communicate online, the physical being of who you are and who the other person is COMPLETELY not there. You do not have that sense of physicality at all, even if you dream that you do. And that FIRST face to face meeting will either blow that first online connection out of the water and erase it or it will totally intensify it.

Don't ever tell yourself it's your fault or it's the other person's fault when the online vibing does not automatically happen offline. It's a totally random thing if it happens or not, you almost have to keep in mind that even though you know everything deep about each other online, you still don't know for real how you will relate to each other in person, cause that is something that HAS to happen in person, it can't be approximated well enough or at all when you talk with each other online.

That is just down to the human phenomenon of people automatically "clicking" in person. Sometimes you do and sometimes you don't. And you can't be upset when it doesn't happen with someone you totally get along with online.
I've tried hard to put that realization in words maybe a few times on the old AP boards but I never could quite explain it the way I know it in my brain and soul. I think I did better this time explaining it and I hope you know what I mean.

It's just a fact of life and the connections one does make via online communication like this, they are still good but you have to make yourself realize that they are by nature incomplete in regards your physical self. That is a totally okay thing but when you KNOW you and the other people will meet in person, please always make yourself realize that you really don't know how the other person will like or connect with you or not when they do meet you.

It is not anyone's fault when it doesn't continue offline like it did online, it's just a random human thing that happens. It happens exactly the opposite way TOO, some folks that you didn't connect that deep with online you might meet them later in person and find out that you totally are in sync with each other friendwise.

Peace, friends. :)

J9 said:

wow I never knew temba wrote a thesis on afropunk. Thats really cool, I wish I could read it. does he ever come back to the site nowdays?
RoRo, I guess I feel like you sometimes when I think about AP. When it was a major part of my life I guess I felt like I had finally found people that I could connect with. But in the real world I didnt really find those connections to translate off of the computer, the people who I have met and some had relationships with I didnt find them to be really real. when I met and spent time with people off the site, some people were cool but some people just want to use you. Its too much of a fantasy, theres something about online communities maybe they just have to stay online, they can never be real

Permalink Reply by Xombie Panik on September 19, 2009 at 11:38am

Yeah Rosenda that has happened a few times when I met people offline...all of a sudden I hated them lol. Not APers so far (well ok one, but I can't even remember her name), but usually yuppy types of people I met online and met up with to work on projects. When you dress like me that's gonna happen with normal people though.

BTW since "this is a where are they now" I'm burnt up...Odd Rocker knows all about it.
Some of you know I went into a mental hospital and I had been on meds before that for a few years, that program messed up on me. Was physically sick from allergic reactions to Seroquel, throwing up blood for a long time & a grocery list of other symptoms. Eventually left that clinic, they sabotage me every time I try and get into a new one...had a lawyer get the REAL full copy of my records they were sending out. They had put a letter at the end to sabotage me from getting into a new clinic. Long story short (it really is long as hell this is year 2) between the bipolar and the anxiety I have been a wreck for a long time. When I get in a new clinic hopefully I can get decent meds again and I'll be back rallying people up, setting up AP shows and playing onstage. Meanwhile though this is the worst time of my life, so mail me some absynthe or some shit.

Rosenda said:

J9, I have found that the same way in real day to day life with people I meet in person.
Some folks turn out to be your always trust life long friends and or loves and some are fly by night "why the hell was I so interested?" I'm sure the same goes for people who have met me. Some people click and some people don't, but I think it's harder, to deal with the contrast of first vibing well with people online. When it happens and the few times I've met the person in real life, I always force myself to reality in my mind that physical face to face meetups are 50/50 that they'll work out or not work out, REGARDLESS of how close you feel you were online.
The thing is when we communicate online, the physical being of who you are and who the other person is COMPLETELY not there. You do not have that sense of physicality at all, even if you dream that you do. And that FIRST face to face meeting will either blow that first online connection out of the water and erase it or it will totally intensify it.

Don't ever tell yourself it's your fault or it's the other person's fault when the online vibing does not automatically happen offline. It's a totally random thing if it happens or not, you almost have to keep in mind that even though you know everything deep about each other online, you still don't know for real how you will relate to each other in person, cause that is something that HAS to happen in person, it can't be approximated well enough or at all when you talk with each other online.

That is just down to the human phenomenon of people automatically "clicking" in person. Sometimes you do and sometimes you don't. And you can't be upset when it doesn't happen with someone you totally get along with online.
I've tried hard to put that realization in words maybe a few times on the old AP boards but I never could quite explain it the way I know it in my brain and soul. I think I did better this time explaining it and I hope you know what I mean.

It's just a fact of life and the connections one does make via online communication like this, they are still good but you have to make yourself realize that they are by nature incomplete in regards your physical self. That is a totally okay thing but when you KNOW you and the other people will meet in person, please always make yourself realize that you really don't know how the other person will like or connect with you or not when they do meet you.

It is not anyone's fault when it doesn't continue offline like it did online, it's just a random human thing that happens. It happens exactly the opposite way TOO, some folks that you didn't connect that deep with online you might meet them later in person and find out that you totally are in sync with each other friendwise.

Peace, friends. :)

J9 said:
wow I never knew temba wrote a thesis on afropunk. Thats really cool, I wish I could read it. does he ever come back to the site nowdays?
RoRo, I guess I feel like you sometimes when I think about AP. When it was a major part of my life I guess I felt like I had finally found people that I could connect with. But in the real world I didnt really find those connections to translate off of the computer, the people who I have met and some had relationships with I didnt find them to be really real. when I met and spent time with people off the site, some people were cool but some people just want to use you. Its too much of a fantasy, theres something about online communities maybe they just have to stay online, they can never be real

Permalink Reply by Fast Eddy on September 28, 2009 at 10:28pm

me and u alwayz hit it off pretty well calvin. i dont judge. i dont dress it, but da attitude iz there. ask my family and co-workerz. lol

calvinchaos said:

Yeah Rosenda that has happened a few times when I met people offline...all of a sudden I hated them lol. Not APers so far (well ok one, but I can't even remember her name), but usually yuppy types of people I met online and met up with to work on projects. When you dress like me that's gonna happen with normal people though.

BTW since "this is a where are they now" I'm burnt up...Odd Rocker knows all about it.
Some of you know I went into a mental hospital and I had been on meds before that for a few years, that program messed up on me. Was physically sick from allergic reactions to Seroquel, throwing up blood for a long time & a grocery list of other symptoms. Eventually left that clinic, they sabotage me every time I try and get into a new one...had a lawyer get the REAL full copy of my records they were sending out. They had put a letter at the end to sabotage me from getting into a new clinic. Long story short (it really is long as hell this is year 2) between the bipolar and the anxiety I have been a wreck for a long time. When I get in a new clinic hopefully I can get decent meds again and I'll be back rallying people up, setting up AP shows and playing onstage. Meanwhile though this is the worst time of my life, so mail me some absynthe or some shit.

Rosenda said:
J9, I have found that the same way in real day to day life with people I meet in person.
Some folks turn out to be your always trust life long friends and or loves and some are fly by night "why the hell was I so interested?" I'm sure the same goes for people who have met me. Some people click and some people don't, but I think it's harder, to deal with the contrast of first vibing well with people online. When it happens and the few times I've met the person in real life, I always force myself to reality in my mind that physical face to face meetups are 50/50 that they'll work out or not work out, REGARDLESS of how close you feel you were online.
The thing is when we communicate online, the physical being of who you are and who the other person is COMPLETELY not there. You do not have that sense of physicality at all, even if you dream that you do. And that FIRST face to face meeting will either blow that first online connection out of the water and erase it or it will totally intensify it.

Don't ever tell yourself it's your fault or it's the other person's fault when the online vibing does not automatically happen offline. It's a totally random thing if it happens or not, you almost have to keep in mind that even though you know everything deep about each other online, you still don't know for real how you will relate to each other in person, cause that is something that HAS to happen in person, it can't be approximated well enough or at all when you talk with each other online.

That is just down to the human phenomenon of people automatically "clicking" in person. Sometimes you do and sometimes you don't. And you can't be upset when it doesn't happen with someone you totally get along with online.
I've tried hard to put that realization in words maybe a few times on the old AP boards but I never could quite explain it the way I know it in my brain and soul. I think I did better this time explaining it and I hope you know what I mean.

It's just a fact of life and the connections one does make via online communication like this, they are still good but you have to make yourself realize that they are by nature incomplete in regards your physical self. That is a totally okay thing but when you KNOW you and the other people will meet in person, please always make yourself realize that you really don't know how the other person will like or connect with you or not when they do meet you.

It is not anyone's fault when it doesn't continue offline like it did online, it's just a random human thing that happens. It happens exactly the opposite way TOO, some folks that you didn't connect that deep with online you might meet them later in person and find out that you totally are in sync with each other friendwise.

Peace, friends. :)

J9 said:
wow I never knew temba wrote a thesis on afropunk. Thats really cool, I wish I could read it. does he ever come back to the site nowdays?
RoRo, I guess I feel like you sometimes when I think about AP. When it was a major part of my life I guess I felt like I had finally found people that I could connect with. But in the real world I didnt really find those connections to translate off of the computer, the people who I have met and some had relationships with I didnt find them to be really real. when I met and spent time with people off the site, some people were cool but some people just want to use you. Its too much of a fantasy, theres something about online communities maybe they just have to stay online, they can never be real

Permalink Reply by Fredric Hall on December 25, 2009 at 9:32pm

Long story real short:

Been going to a shrink
Been to three different jobs.
Moved up to the North Side of Chicago

That's it.

Oh, and I got real drunk and blackout a couple of times. Cheers. Drinking is bad;)

Permalink Reply by CHINO on June 2, 2011 at 6:41pm

Chino here.......let's see.......stuck in a relationship that should have ended 5 years ago but due to an emerging medical situation, Trying to leave is damn near impossible......hurt the one person that truly understood what i'm about.....audtioned for a couple of band but finding they suck......neverending bullshit....