Thicknes w/ Pride? Thickness w/ Shame?

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Venus MOOK on January 19, 2010 at 10:16pm

I am an uncomfortable size 20. because I was once a tight 14. and I would like to lose weight. not that i want to be thin or anything. I would just like to be in shape. To be 200lbs exact would make me very happy. But what i do think as thick women we should look at the health facts about being unhealthy and big. whether 170lbs to 350lbs we need to look at our health. Black women are dying and being hospitalized fast for simple things we can prevent like heart disease, diabetes, back , knee,high blood pressure and liver problems. Then you see us chasing after the stomach staple cure, instead just trying to become a bit more active and watch a little more over what we eat. I know my culprit is bread and cake.So instead of dismissing all bread and cake. i do a little cake every now and again and I mostly cut out bread and when i do eat bread it's high fiber and whole grain. I eat fairly healthy these days, for weightloss but also because I don't want to be sick. I have not lost much weight and I'm not in a rush to do so. I guess my point is that I am thick and proud but I am also striving to be healthy and I'm not ashamed.

Permalink Reply by JICA on January 19, 2010 at 10:29pm

im 170 but im only 5'0 in height so I look a lot bigger. my greatest love is bread. i've started losing weight but its really hard to stay motivated to work out. I think body shape is a preference. if you wanna be thick be thick. if you dont then lose weight but its really annoying to watch people complain about being overweight over a meal of chili cheese burgers and donuts. If your gonna eat that way be ready to gain a little weight, but either way dont complain. People got a choice to go either way.

Venus MOOK said:

I am an uncomfortable size 20. because I was once a tight 14. and I would like to lose weight. not that i want to be thin or anything. I would just like to be in shape. To be 200lbs exact would make me very happy. But what i do think as thick women we should look at the health facts about being unhealthy and big. whether 170lbs to 350lbs we need to look at our health. Black women are dying and being hospitalized fast for simple things we can prevent like heart disease, diabetes, back , knee,high blood pressure and liver problems. Then you see us chasing after the stomach staple cure, instead just trying to become a bit more active and watch a little more over what we eat. I know my culprit is bread and cake.So instead of dismissing all bread and cake. i do a little cake every now and again and I mostly cut out bread and when i do eat bread it's high fiber and whole grain. I eat fairly healthy these days, for weightloss but also because I don't want to be sick. I have not lost much weight and I'm not in a rush to do so. I guess my point is that I am thick and proud but I am also striving to be healthy and I'm not ashamed.

Permalink Reply by CurvyDivaJC on January 25, 2010 at 8:44am

Right now I am like Venus, I am tettering between a size 20-22. I want to be a size 16. I used to be a size 12/14. I am trying to get down a little for my Cabo trip in May; partly because of the very restricting airplane seats and because I have now began to have back problems and sleep apenea. I am trying to eat healthy but recently been diagnosed with a binge eating disorder. I try to stay clear to "dieting" because that sends me into a frenzy. I am trying to become more comfortable with my body and not beat myself up because of the weight gain and it is hard. Especially with my favorite stores I can now only shop online cause they don't carry plus size in the stores. That is hugely frustrating to me. But you have to be happy with what you have. You can be thick but you have to be healthy. I will never be a 12 again, but I do want to be a healthy 16/18.

Permalink Reply by lyfenlyn on January 28, 2010 at 8:45pm

Hmmmm. That's a good question. When I was growing up from age 5 I was in dance classes. I trained with a dance company and it was always in the plan to be a dancer when I grew up. I moved to Washington with my mom at a crucial point in my training, and because moms didn't 'want to pay for dance classes' I stopped training and started clubbing to get my fix. At about 25 my friends started moving away and the club scene was getting stale. I was always barely hanging on financially so dance classes on my own were not something I could go consistantly for myself. That's when I started getting involved with social misfits who couldn't dance and didn't like going out. That's when I started gaining weight. My original weight is 140, and I gained about 10lbs a year for 10 years. The first 50 I could still work around some. Wear heels and skirts above the knee. After that, not so much. After about 210 that's when I started to realize my body had changed drastically. My weight gain is what you would call environmental. I had always been close to broke and struggling. I lived on pasta, hot dogs, sandwiches and cereal. Food bank foods and stuff. If I got food stamps then I could get fruit and veggies. But the lack of regular excercise was what was getting me. Sitting home and eating. Or getting in a yo yo of running out of food and not eating for a few days then when I got food binging on lots of fatty stuff because I had been dreaming about it.

The funny thing was when I moved to Florida one of my goals was when I got to Miami to get back into the studio and dance again. I planned to learn all the Latin dances and get back into hip hop dancing again. I dispise gyms, and hate working out. There is nothing more boring to me than that, and I feel totally judged when I am there. I looked at my clothes when I moved and realized I was living completely covered up from head to toe. Skirts down to my ankles and long sleve shirts! Subconsiously I had developed some sort of shame about my body. It was already hard enough being in an all white enviornment for so long, as white mens asthetic is damn near the opposite of black mens. Even when I was 20 lbs over my orginal weight white men made me feel like I was a joke.

When I moved to the south everything changed. Men responded favorably to me 100 extra pounds and all. It's really something having lots of attention everywhere you go. In 2005 I fell and tore my knee, and therefore hardcore dancing is out of the question until get my knee fixed. Affording insurance is the current issue. So would I like my original athletic, dancers body back. Hell yes. Going into the fashion industry I'm sure it would give me and edge. Having gained the weight however has given me perspective that I would have never gotten any other way. I guess I am lucky because though I weigh over 250 I have it distributed in a way that I can get away with it some. Men call me thick. Which s great but it doesn't stop here.

My dream is to come up financially so I can get my knee fixed, get back to regular dance classes and afford all the veggies, fruit and organically grown fishies I want. To afford a clean healthy diet is a fantasy for me.

Permalink Reply by Erica (Raven) Branch-Butler on February 13, 2010 at 12:25pm

I'm 5'1", and a size 16/18 on top, a 9/10/12 (depending on cut) jeans size. I'm planning to get back down to loose 9/10's but I've come to the conclusion that I actually look pretty okay for my age, etc,. So, I'm focusing more on being fit, and feeling good.

Permalink Reply by Nadira_Akila on April 12, 2010 at 4:35am

I'm always loving me and confident within myself but the truth is all plus size folk are not healthy. If you're healthy and comfortable within your skin that's sexy but some people use the extra weight as something to hide behind. Personally I don't want to be thin I'm just going to go back to a size that supports me being fit and happy. I think thick women look better and are awesome looking but we also need to focus on being thick not morbidly obese...theres a difference and some of our sistas dont want to admit it. Peace Fam!

Permalink Reply by Mark Clemons on September 3, 2010 at 9:27pm

Ms.Lyfenlyn U look Amazing regardless of your size.I've gone from 115 to 170 in just 2 1/2 years,I actually needed to gain weight.I've always loved thick women even when I was skinny.

lyfenlyn said:

Hmmmm. That's a good question. When I was growing up from age 5 I was in dance classes. I trained with a dance company and it was always in the plan to be a dancer when I grew up. I moved to Washington with my mom at a crucial point in my training, and because moms didn't 'want to pay for dance classes' I stopped training and started clubbing to get my fix. At about 25 my friends started moving away and the club scene was getting stale. I was always barely hanging on financially so dance classes on my own were not something I could go consistantly for myself. That's when I started getting involved with social misfits who couldn't dance and didn't like going out. That's when I started gaining weight. My original weight is 140, and I gained about 10lbs a year for 10 years. The first 50 I could still work around some. Wear heels and skirts above the knee. After that, not so much. After about 210 that's when I started to realize my body had changed drastically. My weight gain is what you would call environmental. I had always been close to broke and struggling. I lived on pasta, hot dogs, sandwiches and cereal. Food bank foods and stuff. If I got food stamps then I could get fruit and veggies. But the lack of regular excercise was what was getting me. Sitting home and eating. Or getting in a yo yo of running out of food and not eating for a few days then when I got food binging on lots of fatty stuff because I had been dreaming about it.

The funny thing was when I moved to Florida one of my goals was when I got to Miami to get back into the studio and dance again. I planned to learn all the Latin dances and get back into hip hop dancing again. I dispise gyms, and hate working out. There is nothing more boring to me than that, and I feel totally judged when I am there. I looked at my clothes when I moved and realized I was living completely covered up from head to toe. Skirts down to my ankles and long sleve shirts! Subconsiously I had developed some sort of shame about my body. It was already hard enough being in an all white enviornment for so long, as white mens asthetic is damn near the opposite of black mens. Even when I was 20 lbs over my orginal weight white men made me feel like I was a joke.

When I moved to the south everything changed. Men responded favorably to me 100 extra pounds and all. It's really something having lots of attention everywhere you go. In 2005 I fell and tore my knee, and therefore hardcore dancing is out of the question until get my knee fixed. Affording insurance is the current issue. So would I like my original athletic, dancers body back. Hell yes. Going into the fashion industry I'm sure it would give me and edge. Having gained the weight however has given me perspective that I would have never gotten any other way. I guess I am lucky because though I weigh over 250 I have it distributed in a way that I can get away with it some. Men call me thick. Which s great but it doesn't stop here.

My dream is to come up financially so I can get my knee fixed, get back to regular dance classes and afford all the veggies, fruit and organically grown fishies I want. To afford a clean healthy diet is a fantasy for me.