... the other Black experience

Black Women and Men With GLBT Tendencies

Disclaimer: This was originally posted on a forum, but this has been edited for blog posting.


So, I have a question: what do women think about dating a man who just happens to be have some slight homosexual tendencies?

I'm just asking because if there seems to be anything I have learned about black people from YouTube is that some of them are hella conservative. Everywhere you turn, there is someone talking about interracial dating, about general coonery, about their place in politics, about mainstream hip-hop, some of them even talk a lot about what makes a me the issue lies. On various black sites, you see black people callling gays homo, faggot, and holding onto the idea of it being a sin. This is where but I think the pressure is mostly on dudes, especially when it comes to one's sexuality.

I remember saying something like this to my girlfriend. You see, what I tend to do to weed out all of my prospects for dates is tell them straight up what I like whenever the time is appropriate. That means explaining that I like women and transgendered women as well. Some girls weren't with it, some were understanding. But my girl was not only supportive of it, but the thought of it sexually intrigued her. Haha!

I told her that I don't know exactly what one would call it (bisexual seems kind of incorrect, since it cuts out trans- as an option, and it's obvious my sexual attraction swings towards the women more than it will the man), but I liked women and transwomen. She didn't care as long as I was clean, and as long as I don't go cheating with anyone.

To me, I think it was easier to just say what I was, and be grateful that I don't have them if they didn't accept it. But the little bit of nervousness comes with the common pressure on what it is to be a man. Because not being straight gives the option of a man being a bottom (or a top, for that matter), most equate that to not really being manly. Not only that, but sometimes coming out like that also gives some women the paranoid feeling that he or she will be lost to that of a similar sex.

So, I wonder...what do women think of dating any man who isn't entirely straight?

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Comment by Robin Renee on January 7, 2013 at 7:30pm

Nice to see your post. I am a bi/queer woman, and I really love bi/queer men and trans/gender fluid people, too. 


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