punks gotta eat: if bands were food, what food would they be?

There’s a thing where dog owners look like their dogs, and it’s fucking weird. While slurping down a plate of spagetti we got to thinking how pasta is kind of like music– everyone likes it, it’s everywhere and it can be servered a thousand different ways. So naturally, we took it step further. The next time someone says “you look like breakfast” they might just saying they can only tolerate you in the morning time, not that you’re tasty. (We know– we’re weird hungryboys over here). Welcome to the new weekly foodie feature: PUNKS GOTTA EAT!

By: Henny X Harmon

Erykah Badu = Gumbo

Erykah isn’t just any kind of gumbo. Vegan gumbo with a touch of wild rice. A gumbo from a down south hole in the wall joint with some gluten free bread and a side of herbal tea if you’re in the mood. She’s spicy, comforting, unusual and familiar. And DAMN do we love it!

(and she DID do that “Gumbo” song with Mark Ronson cause she was thinking about Gumbo when she wrote it. it’s almost too perfect)

Cerebral Ballzy = The Garbage Plate

The Rochester, NY late night delight is a disorganized combination of either cheeseburger, hamburger, Italian sausages, steak, chicken white or red hots, a grilled cheese sandwich, fried fish, or eggs, served on top of one or two of the following: home fries, fries, beans, and mac salad. Sounds gross, tastes AMAZING!  The title of the band and the platter are a little sus but who doesn’t love a mess of deliciousness at 4am after drinking enough alcohol to make a pony drunk. It’s rebellious (mac and salad and steak and sausage should NOT be ok) but FUCK IT, we do what we want on the same damn plate.

Bad Brains = Pop Rocks & Soda

You might die at a Bad Brains show. Or you might not. but one thing’s for sure if you’re there to mosh you’ll leave with some pretty gnarly ass memories. Just like pop rocks and Coke…you’ll never know personally until you experience it yourself. And one thing’s for certain…You’ll most definitely have fun.

Nicki Minaj= Sock

Just think of yourself being in one of your most favorite eateries where everything is the same; same crowd, same menu, just something familiar. Now imagine a new cook who added a new item on the menu. You order it and it looks interesting and yet familiar, but it comes with a side of honey from the local Queen Bee Company so you think you might like it. Then you find a dirty glitter sock in your food. Obviously you don’t want it there, it has no purpose, and spoiled your appetite from ever wanting to eat again. 

Body Language = Cotton Candy

MMmMMMM! it’s light, it’s sweet, it’s FUN and it’s impossible to resist- Just like Body Language! Anytime someone mentions cotton candy you get a little bit excited. like OH! YES! and it’s SOOO good, you just can’t help but share.

IS IT LUNCH YET?