... the other Black experience

This particular topic strikes a nerve, because it makes no sense at all. After my rant I hope you all have some answers because I am simply confused. Afro-punk’s (the documentary) main purpose was to expose issues that minorities face within a white washed scene and show each one of us within these scenes that we are not alone. A few years later the film has grown into an awesome community of die hard rock fans of color from all corners of the Earth, mission accomplished. However I notice a disturbing pattern amongst AP men and women that I can’t ignore. Allow me to explain.

Why Don’t Afro-Punks Hook-up?
Words Amber Alexander

Amber and her boyfriend, Mike, who met on

At the AP fest 2010 in Brooklyn, lots of gorgeous people came out to support their favorite bands and have a great time. There were punks galore with sick ink, piercings, cool outfits and shit. Yet barely anyone seemed to mingle. Call me delusional if you want, but I witnessed it first hand with my own two eyes. I did notice hell of a lot of interracial couples though, which is fine diversity is beautiful but the afro-punk guys and gals appeared to completely ignore each other. I leaned back against a tall gate under the blazing sun and observed non-black girls by the skating ramp getting lustful stares while fellow AP females received nothing but two second glances. Oh don’t think you ladies are exempt, I saw y’all drooling over Dave Navarro look-a-likes meanwhile Lajon Witherspoon’s long lost twin brother was being overlooked. What gives?

More recently I ran into a black metal head dude on the bus in my neighborhood and he was so eager to chat with me. Quite frankly I was shocked because I’m so used to getting the boot from guys like him plus we were in the middle of Canarsie, Brooklyn. We spent half our ride discussing music, his badass d.i.y. jacket, and my love for bad brains. Needless to say, it got pretty loud in there. He also mentioned that he had a hard time dating black girls in the scene because they only like white guys. I told him my boyfriend is just like him; a black guy into metal and he was surprised.

Speaking of my boyfriend, outsiders assume we both date outside of our race. Then piss their pants when they see us together as if to say we are an abnormal couple. Rare? Yes. Strange? Not even. It just so happens that we are sexually attracted to both black people AND rock music. There’s more where that came from.

Too often black folks within the rock scene who are fully aware of other blacks just like them completely dismiss each other. They refuse to date, hang out, or even be associated. It is very ironic that we complain about finding fellow blacks with mutual interests to date yet when we do we run back to blondie. Maybe it’s fear of being tossed to the side or maybe most of us truly aren’t attracted to our own kind who knows. Whatever the case I do know one thing, we have a ways to go.

Views: 2198

Tags: Afro-punk,, dating, hook-up


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Comment by Bre'anna Brown on December 2, 2013 at 5:50pm

I personally would love to date a black guy but I think personally it's about location. I don't see hardly any afro-punk guys in my area and even the college I attend which is a predominantly black college I have come across hardly any afro-punk guys. 

Comment by Billie Badazz Law on April 14, 2013 at 4:12pm

I read the blog, but not all the comments....I'm sure their great and all but I'd rather just say what I gots to say. Sorry if I'm steppin on any toes here lol....I don't find, scratch that I have NEVER found an AP-chick. I did find a white girl who happened to be black and she was pretty much married to this white guy, but she love my AP-azz and introduced us to kick it before she turned the tables and dropped my pants lol......anywho, that's the closest I've come an AP-sistah. Like I said previously, all the others aren't down with an alternative brother, the music, the attitude, the whatever. I just haven't met many, if any AP-chicks and the first few didn't like brothers so I date alot of white girls. That's not to say I'm an American Idiot mind-fucked by America. I love my black people no matter what they mindstate is and alot of us are fucked in one way or another my society as a whole. That's why alot of AP's out there are mindfucked into LOVING white culture cause they are taught and see them as better, purer, right, whatever. I like it cuz I still love a guitar, drums and bass goin hard together, hell, the rock music I do, I rap my ass off to it and EVERYBODY loves it. But when you are part of this kind of counter-culture chances are it's because the other is a big influence in your life and you feel someway about your own culture. If I could find an AP-chick I would by all means talk to her, try to kick it with her, but I just ain't found none in the parts that I'm from. So I'm left with those who are accepting of somebody as different and alternative as I am, sorry that happens to mostly be people who aren't black and love the idea of a black man being his own man and having nothing to do with whats' popular and only with what feels right to him. ANY AP-SISTAHS FEEL FREE TO CONTACT

Comment by Gullah*Gotham*Glitter on September 11, 2012 at 8:33pm

It has always been a dream of mine to find the tattooed chocolate sweety of my dreams.  I am still looking for the one who loves The Plasmatics, E-40, and Jah Cure as much as I do.  But I have noticed this.  I think there are some out there who feel as though just because there is one other APer in the room that they shouldn't feel obligated to talk to each other.  The thing is, those people are being hypocrits.  To say that you never dated someone of your own race because you couldn't find someone like you. Now that you have, you ignore them? That's signs of being white washed

Comment by bel on July 30, 2012 at 5:11am

The result of believin in some postfascist German narratives about 'Blutwurzel' the neck by bi-roots of homo_ethnicity and [conspi_] race circumvention, is, that no one feel well in the heritage of fathers wear dome and Mums femme fatalities. The pleasure of communication has its borderlines in realpolitical stubbornness of being ousted by one of the peer side.

Every time the same question on which side are you on!

So my BDSM-quest is by sub the dilemma out of deficits capital_Ism the frame: why the role model of being bi_heritage as sepsis of - is the fraternity of game the act as emotional plateau or better ire of the ongoing Lady feast,..or should this topic for postfascist Europeans abandon the 'sylum hook out again by all that homo_national_Ism ¼hit again?


Comment by NoRe on July 29, 2012 at 11:55pm

I found this thread interesting as well as everyone else, and agree with some of the things people have mentioned prior. I do believe it is a combination of two things, not being attracted to one another and not giving each other a chance. I thought the whole point of this site was to get to know people on a friendly level not even just "hook up" however people close themselves off and friend the same people while not getting to know anyone outside this "circle". It reminds me of h.s. this "I'm to good to associate or speak to you" kind of behavior which is truly sad. While I find nothing wrong with dating inter-racially as some have mentioned, I feel that you won't be understood as well as someone within your own race who deals with racial and prejudice struggles on a daily basis. I too agree that we have a ways to go, and that we as a whole should learn to open ourselves more, drop the cool exterior, and love each other, it could be a beautiful thing you know =)

Comment by Britt ( Auxillary Priest ) on July 6, 2012 at 3:39am

Interesting thread. To piggyback on what a few people have already mentioned. I think alot of us have grown up being segregated from our communtiy becuase of our different interests. And as a result, you go with who you have things in common with. I see alot of AP dudes with white girls,ill confess im never surprised by this.Im one to assume that 80% are dealing with some self hatred issues, and the other 20% just happened to end up in a interacial relationship. Personally,my boyfriend of 4+ years was white, i barely noticed Im attracted to people not races, but if i were at an AP event, id expect to be macked by white guys for sure. We have some work to do...

Comment by Annunaki_Kizzle on June 14, 2012 at 7:58am

An Afro Punk Female Is The Most Beautiful Being I Know Of.... Each And Every One Should Be Treated Like The Queens They Are .... I live in Cincinnati Ohio USA And There Are Not Many If Any Afro Punkers Out Here That I Am Aware Of..... I Was Even Considering Changing My Location To Find The Afro Punk Lady Of My Dreams .....I Say That To Say There Is Hope ....But I Guess Some Afro Punkers Are So Use To Being The Only One In There Area That They Feel More Comfortable Dating Humans That They are Use To....

Comment by Kemet on October 31, 2011 at 3:20pm
Comment by Faraji Toure' on November 12, 2010 at 2:32pm
i was told that some Afro-punks ran to the culture (rock) to escape the culture (black) because it allowed them to mimic who they wanted to be (white). this is just hear say, not my belief...but i wish someone would really answer your question here. :)
Well, this aint just what I've heard... I have seent it!!! It aint hard to believe @ all just Acute Negrosis manifesting itself once again!
That being said, I met my current g/f @ an AP show (Movie was shown & then my band played) As well as there are quite a few AP sistas I love dearly! They know who they are! Cyber hug to you all!!!
Comment by Hitch on October 30, 2011 at 10:23pm
One of the people followed in the Afro Punk movie could help answer this question in part, I think. I can't remember her name but my point of bringing her up is that simply acknowledging a situation doesn't mean change. There's a lot of subconscious behavior that goes into socializing in a subculture in a white dominated subculture of a white dominated society.
Comment by timothy peterson on October 12, 2011 at 9:17pm
hey i have the same issue .i am 44 and live in Philly . i would say i have been in the seen since i was a teenager groweing up in an all black hood in the suburbs. i too have wondered the same thing,whats going on? I have dated and was married to a white fine dime but i am really attracted to my own kind but they only date white glad i found this site and i would like to network in other cities, your blog should raise some replies . I  can tell you some of the youth are still lost and some arent real.

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